I can't keep the good level of play

Hello. Can you help me? I'm the last silver. When it comes to be aware what's around you, to control bombsides, to play smart, to shoot from medium distance,I'm quite good. It's worse when shooting in close distance. I panic after failed first shots and forget how to aim. I paste below two demos of my matches. One is from won match, where I played good, where I played very smart in first round especially, the other one is from the match right after previous one, which I lost and played very bad. What can you suggest me? I think it's something with my mentality - if I start good, it will be good match. If I start bad, I play like noob (especially when it comes to aiming). What's wrong with me?